Signs to look for and observe are the following:
Body language
Are they showing signs of nervousness, are they uncomfortable? Are they fidgety, perspiring or maybe they are too calm, too much in control. We often show and display extremes of behaviour when we know we are lying.
Bills and receipts
Always be in charge of paying the bills and logging the receipts. If they travel away from home a lot then observing their receipts will often tell you where they have been and with whom they have eaten.
One of the women in my book remembers one receipt in particular when her husband said he had been to dinner with a male work colleague. From looking at the receipt she knew he was obviously on a first date. This was a woman, there was no doubt in her mind and she was subsequently proved right.
Telephone calls
Check his phone calls. They are often itemised these days. Check the times of the calls, the duration and frequency of the calls. He may try to justify calling a work colleague during the day and may even try to justify calling them in the evening but observe the times; a call made at 10.30 at night is not a business call.
Digital recorders
These can be set for long play allowing you to catch him out. They can be placed in discreet places such as his car, under his work desk or near the telephone.
Key Logger
Should he have a computer with a separate keyboard then you can always use a key logger to trace and obtain his passwords and login details. You will then have a blue print of his activities and the sequence in which they were conducted.
Sim Recovery Pro
This will enable you to see all of his deleted text messages and their content. He may think he has been clever deleting them but there are numerous gadgets around that can uncover all sorts of information.
The Detective
This can be a costly exercise and longwinded if you are just clutching at straws or desperate to discover his infidelities. To reduce your costs try to have as much information as possible to give you and the detective the best opportunity of catching him out the first time. Tilly in my book hired a detective. She wanted him to catch out her husband Jeremy by doing an overnight stakeout when she suspected he was with one of his numerous liaisons. Tilly’s detective got within three feet of them and all the evidence she needed and by the time her husband returned back to the UK twenty four hours later, unaware that he had been caught, Tilly had the photographs’ in front of her ready to confront him.
Buy a Parrot
I remember reading an article in the daily papers about a gentleman who caught out his fiancée. The parrot started mimicking the conversations between her and her lover. Subsequently when they parted he kept the parrot.
Written by Fiona G Laycy
‘Women on Top, 69 Positions to Success – and Saving Your Relationship or Not’ is your survival guide to marriage and divorce. It will help you through the hard times and provide you with examples of how to tackle life with courage and laughter – whether you decide to keep your marriage or not. To find out more about this essential guide to marriage – click the cover image.