If you have been able to gather up information that you know they would not want revealing then you have some leverage which you can use to your full advantage. A lot of women do not have this advantage or opportunity and have often not gathered information for the “just incase” scenario.
Holding onto your most valuable information until the day when you may just need to use this extra ammunition may be the difference in you getting your financial settlement or not. Having a grenade in your back pocket may just come in useful especially if he should decide that he doesn’t want to pay his agreed maintenance and financial settlement.
Don’t be afraid to pull the lever; if you can release the trigger from a distance of several hundred miles then all the better. You will have to be prepared to use this information knowing the consequences of your actions. This may not sit comfortably with you but when you have been left with no other options then there is often only one way to behave and that is to be tough and fight your corner. As they say “ hell has no fury like a woman scorned”. But be prepared for a fight.
He might not want to part with the money; he thinks it’s his money! He may not think you will follow through with this course of action knowing the effect it will have on your own future, your children and his future depending on the information you are about to reveal. He may firmly believe that you would never do that to him, destroy him.
Tilly’s husband believes that she will always love him and would never do anything to jeopardise her future maintenance if she doesn’t get her settlement. This naivety could very well signify his final downfall as Tilly has many layers of information on Jeremy and his associates amassed over many years that once unleashed will fan out and destroy all those in the path of her getting her full financial settlement.
That said, men can be manipulative and, on occasions, they may get the upper hand. This may be therefore more down to our personality, our characteristics and our own moral outlook. Men think that they are clever. Haven’t they realised by now that we can out wit them and out manoeuvre them at every stage!
Written by Fiona G Laycy
‘Women on Top, 69 Positions to Success – and Saving Your Relationship or Not’ is your survival guide to marriage and divorce. It will help you through the hard times and provide you with examples of how to tackle life with courage and laughter – whether you decide to keep your marriage or not. To find out more about this essential guide to marriage – click the cover image.